My biggest pet peeve is... hearing people chew gum with their mouth open. This includes my wife—she sounds like a starving cow discovering grass for the first time. It really feels like a stab in the back because she’s my wife and I should be able to trust her, but she betrays that trust every time she open-mouth gum-chews.

The first thing I do when I get home is... pee. I pee before I leave somewhere, and then again when I get home. That’s what it’s like to be in your 30s and suddenly have an uncooperative bladder.

My childhood nickname was... Skippy. One day my fourth-grade teacher, Ms. Tobias, told me I reminded her of Skippy peanut butter, and, pun intended, it stuck with me until I graduated high school. I guess she just thought the only way my body could be that shape was if I ate peanut butter all day long.

My dream role is... Teddy Roosevelt. History is my geeky side passion, and I recently finished reading a trilogy on him. This guy was a governor, an assemblyman, and a Rough Rider! I lick my chops at the thought of playing somebody that complex.

When I need a pick-me up I... hug my kids, who are 5 1/2 and 2 1/2. My kindergartner has recently discovered the joy of spelling and simple arithmetic—and I’ve discovered I may need to go back to kindergarten.

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