8 Ways You're Unknowingly Sabotaging Your Relationship

I once had the questionable fortune of sharing an office with a serial online dater who made a fine art of honing her OkCupid profile. She gave this thing the attention a novelist gives the revisions of a 500-page epic. He had to like poetry AND foreign films AND opera AND riding a fixed-gear bike AND have a good job AND have traveled abroad AND want kids AND eat Brussels sprouts. You know where this is going, right? Meanwhile, she had a diverse group of good friends, plenty of whom were available for riding bikes while snacking on Brussels sprouts on the way to the opera. She didn't need any of that stuff, she just needed a nice guy to hang out with.

The same applies once you're in a relationship, too. He doesn't have to be your love and your life partner and your racketball opponent and your Tex-Mex-cooking assistant. You have other friends to fulfill other needs, so – this is important!—don't forget to nurture those other relationships. Needing your one guy to be your one everything puts undue strain on both of you. Not to mention your Brussels sprouts friend, who misses you.