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3 Ways to Deal with the People Who Drive You Nuts

Rev. Ed Bacon, author of the new book 8 Habits of Love: Open Your Heart, Open Your Mind, offers tips to deal with your toughest relationships.
Stillness
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Start With Stillness
Before engaging with a difficult person, spend a few minutes trying to adopt a more receptive frame of mind. Go for a stroll, meditate, or breathe deeply to center yourself—you'll be less likely to blow up. If tempers do flare once you start talking, take a short break to regain perspective before approaching your nemesis again.
Paying attention to a friend
Photo: Thinkstock
Give and You Shall Receive
Do the unexpected and give your foe a gift: your undivided attention. ask her open-ended questions; she'll feel heard and more inclined to consider what you have to say. Plus, research has shown that offering even a small act of kindness can boost oxytocin levels, meaning you'll likely feel better about your relationship for that reason alone.
Letting go of a balloon
Photo: Thinkstock
Let it Go
Holding a grudge won't make a person change her behavior—you don't have that much power over someone else. To move on, repeat this mantra: "Her actions take up too much real estate in my brain. If I move them out, I can live freely."

Next: Why the ones we love make us crazy
From the September 2012 issue of O, The Oprah Magazine
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