3 Less-Than-Perfect Couples

Ultrabusy partners "need to schedule time together—set it aside, have it weekly—in a way that both are declaring that they hold their relationship precious and are giving it priority," Papp says: Love requires nurturing. In Gottman's studies, there was a group who ended up divorcing an average of 16 years after the wedding. "They were distinguished from couples who stayed married longer by not having had much 'purely positive affect,' by which we mean interest in one another, affection, humor, empathy, joy, adventure, pure fun together," he says. "They looked great to outsiders, who were usually shocked by their divorce. They just didn't enjoy their time together." Actually, according to Gottman's research, you should have at least five times as many positive moments together as negative if your relationship is to be stable. Translation: Just don't forget to have a good time.