The divorce rate in this country is more than 50 percent for first marriages, Dr. Robin says. But what people don't know is that second marriages fail at an even higher rate. Why? Because people don't learn lessons from the mistakes they've made, Dr. Robin says.
Dr. Robin says it's in the errors and mistakes of our lives—all the times where things did not go well—in which we learn the most. However, the paradox of this is that we spend most of our lives avoiding the very things that teach us, she says.
"When we fail at something, we hide, we lie about it, we cover it up, we pretend, we deny…we put on garb that makes our errors, our failures and our mistakes look glamorous, look beautiful," she says. "And so we're never learning because we spend our energy, our effort, our money and our resources covering up the very thing that is in our lives to teach us."
Are you in financial trouble, but pretending to have money by wearing new clothes? Is your marriage on the rocks, but you're telling others things are great with your spouse? Dr. Robin says instead of hiding your mistakes, face them and learn from them.
"You're going to miss out on all of the lessons, the power, the strength, the wisdom that are in your mistakes, your errors and your failures," she says.
Dr. Robin suggests finding a mistake in your life and claiming the lesson it has for you. "Identify one error, one place of failure, one place of shame," she says. "Take the lesson that is full of wisdom, that is full of knowledge, that is full of liberation, and go and live your best life."
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