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After Neil's suicide, Ellen resisted the urge to start a new relationship for more than two decades. "You have to be able to say, 'It's all right. I can be powerful and be a woman and be loved all at once," she says. "And be alone if I have to. ... Solitude became my friend."

With years of study, therapy and meditation, Ellen says she now enjoys being in a loving relationship. "At last I was able to give something I'd never had to give before, which was myself."
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