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Balancing Your Life


Figure Out What Really Matters to You in Life

Personal coach Laura Berman Fortgang, author of NOW WHAT? 90 Days to a New Life Direction, says getting your priorities clear is the first and most essential step toward achieving a well-balanced life. The important point here is to figure out what you want your priorities to be, not what you think they should be.

"I use an exercise for figuring out what matters most," Fortgang tells WebMD. She has her clients take a couple days off from work to contemplate the following series of questions:
  1. If my life could focus on one thing and one thing only, what would that be?
  2. If I could add a second thing, what would that be?
  3. A third?
  4. A fourth?
  5. A fifth?
If you answer thoughtfully and honestly, the result will be a list of your top five priorities. Fortgang says a typical top-five list might include aspects such as children, spouse, satisfying career, community service, religion or spirituality, health, sports, art, hobbies such as gardening and adventure/travel.

Ismael Al-Ramahi, a graduate student at Baylor College of Medicine, says his current priorities are his wife, his 4-month-old son, and his research. He tells WebMD the key is not only knowing your priorities, but devoting your full attention to just one priority at a time. "Split your time and your mind so that you're thinking about work when you're at work and you're paying attention to the baby when you're with him."




SOURCES: Laura Berman Fortgang, personal coach; and author, Living Your Best Life and NOW WHAT? 90 Days to a New Life Direction. Ismael Al-Ramahi, graduate student, Baylor College of Medicine. Stevan Hobfoll, PhD, distinguished professor of psychology, Kent State University; and co-author, Work Won't Love You Back: The Dual Career Couple's Survival Guide. Lachlan Brown, president, Tech for People. The American Psychological Association. © 2005 WebMD, Inc. All rights reserved.