Ask Oprah's All Stars - That's Embarrassing!
Dr. Phil, how and when do I tell a man that I've lost 160 lbs?
Dr. Phil: You have achieved something that you should be proud of. Even now you're in closed body position. You couldn't even be anymore wrapped up like a mummy. You're in closed body position that means stay away I don't want to present myself to you. You've got to decide that you're gonna give yourself permission to claim what you've achieved, to celebrate what you've achieved and when you meet some guy that's got a problem with that, kick his ass to the curb.
You want to know something about me, let me tell you what I have overcome in my life. Let me tell you about determination and let me tell you about achievement. You've got to give yourself permission to do that.
You don't want to meet them and say, "Hi I'm half of Amber" you know, I wouldn't lead with it. I would tell him about the things that I am really proud of and that I've done a good job with me and then I'd say I have a really big accomplishment that I'd like to tell you about. I've lost 160 pounds in my life. It was a big thing it was painful and I'm really proud of that. Tell him how to feel about it because you need to tell us how to feel about these things.
You need to put the dots real close together and put them with a bright red line and if you tell him you should be proud of me for this then he will. If you say oh I don't know, this is gonna freak you out. Then, then that's what he'll do too. So tell him how to feel about it and when you do, do it early on.
Published on November 11, 2011