Breaking Up with Your Hairdresser

Q: My friend recently decided to try my hairdresser. She loves her new cut but feels guilty about "breaking up" with her stylist of the past 13 years. Should she just stop going? Or should she call and explain she's decided to move on?

A: I don't have hair, but I do have a heart, and if I knew you for 13 years and was responsible for the upkeep of a significant part of your body and one day you mysteriously disappeared, I'd be concerned. Tell your friend to call and let her hairdresser know the time has come for her to move on. —Rudy Rasmus, pastor of St. John's United Methodist Church in Houston

Do the math: An extended conversation every few weeks for 13 years? These two know each other well. If it's tough to phone, how about a note? And don't worry about making up an excuse—every stylist knows tastes change and cuts vary. —Rushworth M. Kidder, founder of the institute for Global Ethics 

No matter how intimate they've become (she does, after all, know the real color of your friend's hair), they're not life partners. Hair is a business. So your friend can walk away without explanation, which would be hurtful to offer anyway. What would she say—"I started seeing someone I love more than you"? —Faith Salie, host of the public radio show Fair Game from PRI with Faith Salie