couple creating a heart made of coins

Illustration: Marcos Chin

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28. Zap the Money Tension from
Your Marriage

You promised to love, honor and cherish—but what about not killing each other over your finances? Suze Orman offers three rules:

1. Keep it private.
Making cutting financial remarks in front of friends helps no one. Ditto, ambushing each other in public about big purchases or financial decisions you've made. You'll only alienate your spouse and make everyone else uncomfortable.

2. Remember—yours, mine and ours.
All family spending and saving should come out of a joint account. Then divvy up anything that's left over into separate accounts that you each manage without input or judgment from the other.

3. Update, upate, update.
You handle the monthly bills, your spouse takes care of the retirement accounts. That's fine. But what I will not tolerate is either of your staying in the dark. Sit down and brief each other once a month on the stuff you handle.