2. Humans Invented Hot Blue!
Hot blue, sadly, is not born of the natural word. There are no hot-blue vegetables or flowers, no hot-blue fruits or whole grains. Scientifically speaking, the lovely rose can't be any shade of blue—hot, cold, frozen or otherwise—due the limits of genetics and natural variation, a mystery that reminds us there are still things out there in the universe to contemplate and spend our lives chasing.

Hot blue, on the other hand, was invented by mere mortals like you and me, and this can provide an unexpectedly welcome flash of insight on those sweltering, sticky, humid summer afternoons when you have undergone some unwelcome trials (the fridge broke, your forgot the conference call with your boss) and the world seems to be headed for a entirely believable cataclysm (war! recession! global warming!).

On such days, head to the nearest park and observe a line of kids ordering 100 percent artificially azure snow cones from a stand if only to allow yourself to suddenly and sweepingly comprehend that yes, being a human is challenging, but there are distinct benefits. We can make impossibilities possible with only syrup and dye! We can grace children with a mouthful of frozen, sweet, idealized sky...

3. If You Don't Love X, You're Never Going to Love X+Y
Has it happened to you? You don't love your primary care doctor or the color of the paint in your new bedroom. You don't love your job or the guy you're seeing. But instead of declaring your feelings about X, you say to yourself: "All I need is a little time to get used to it" or "All I need to do is think about this differently" or "If I were different, I'd like X more because X is sweet or good for my career or a positive step."

Unfortunately, regardless of what Y you add to X, it's still...X. You might like it more, as a result of your efforts. You might get used to it. You might even be grateful for it. But you are not going to love it. Love does not arrive via brainwashing.

Worse, over time, your real feelings about X become impossible to see, buried as they are under Y after Y after Y. And so the best time to understand how you really feel about X is during those moments when you're telling yourself to change yourself to suit your circumstances, instead of telling yourself to change your circumstances.

Right then, something will feel so deeply and funkily wrong that admitting "You know what? This isn't love" is almost always a relief. What may result, hopefully, is another revelation: Not-quite-love, like love, is just an emotion—one you're perfectly allowed to have, without doing anything to fix, dull or deny it.

Next: The security of a security blanket


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