When You Help Yourself, Which Self Are You Helping?
Yet the more one looks into the self-help movement, the more confusion seems to reign. It's common to meet people who tell the same story of being adrift. Having read many books, visited many teachers and joined many groups, they continue to feel unfulfilled. Why? If self-help burgeons year after year, where are all these good intentions and well-meaning advice getting us?
I think a good deal of confusion can be cleared away if you stop for a moment and apply some realistic standards. In order for self-help to work, you need to know a few things with some certainty:
- Who am I today?
- Where am I heading?
- What do I want my future to look like?
Self-help works if it wakes you up, either a little or a lot. The best way to wake up is to know who you are, where you're going and what the future could be. Present reality is the foundation. The future is a vision open to all possibilities.
Meet the enemy of self-help
Once you see the gap between who you are today and what you could be—I mean, really see it, with your heart as well as your brain—awareness will begin to expand. Nothing can stop it, in fact, because there is a hidden dimension to self-help. On the surface, you seem to be improving the self you know, the one that gets depressed, overeats or gets entangled in a bitter divorce.
But at a deeper level, you are uncovering your true self. This self is at peace; it lives in silence, and its greatest joy lies in simply being. The true self is your source. At some point, you find that self-help isn't really about self-improvement. It's about self-discovery. When that stage is reached, much of the confusion and frustration that now exists will change. With a clear purpose in mind, seekers can use self-help as a tool to reach their real goal, which is liberation in fulfillment.
Deepak Choprais the author of more than 50 books on health, success, relationships and spirituality, including his current best-seller,Reinventing the Body, Resurrecting the Soul, and The Ultimate Happiness Prescription, which are available now. You can listen to his show on Saturdays every week onSiriusXMChannels 102 and 155.
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