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Does Carol ever wonder whether she's gay or straight? "I think it's safe to say, after you've been with a woman for [almost 13 years], yeah, I'm pretty gay," she says.

After dating men, Carol says it's a lot easier to be in a relationship with a woman. "My relationship with Lori, I found right from the beginning, there was no game playing. All my other relationships with men, there was so much maneuvering and strategic decisions and stuff," she says. "The emotional intimacy is way different than any relationship I had before with a man. It just works a lot better."

Carol has written about her experiences in her new book, When You Lie About Your Age, the Terrorists Win. "Honestly, so much of my book is about the best things in my life have happened since I'm 40," she says. "I met Lori. We have the best relationship of anyone I know, and she's the one."

Read an excerpt of Carol's new book

Meet wives who lived two lives

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