Inside Sex Therapy
As a result, Dr. Berman says Tamica began to resent Marcus. "She withdrew from the relationship, and if you're resentful toward someone, you're not going to want to have sex with them," Dr. Berman says.
Tamica admits that she withheld sex from Marcus as a punishment. "I felt like he wasn't worthy of me having sex with him if he could not do things I needed him to do," she says. "I would give it to him in rations."
Rationing sex, Dr. Berman says, is protecting yourself when you don't completely trust your partner. "When you have sex with someone, you're giving them a gift," Dr. Berman says. "You're sharing something very sacred and powerful with them, and if you're not feeling good about them and good about the relationship, it's really hard to do."