• Show appreciation and affection.
  • Develop a balance between letting your daughter go and being a nurturing parent of an adult daughter.
  • Build trust with your daughter, and she will be more receptive to your involvement in her life.
  • Respect her autonomy; this is a critical component in building trust and mutual respect.
  • If your adult daughter moves back home, model the kind of mutual respect adults should have for each other. Living with an adult daughter can present opportunities and challenges in maintaining a close relationship. Basic courtesies should be expected and should go both ways. You are not running a hotel; it is your home. You should feel comfortable expressing your needs and expectations.

Excerpted from Too Close for Comfort? Questioning the Intimacy of Today's New Mother-Daughter Relationship by Linda Perlman Gordon and Susan Morris Shaffer © 2009 by Linda Perlman Gordon and Susan Morris Shaffer. Excerpted by permission of The Berkley Publishing Group, a division of Penguin Group (USA) Inc. All rights reserved. No part of this excerpt may be reproduced or reprinted without permission in writing from the publisher.


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