Preloading

Singer/Songwriter Kevin McCall Tearfully Explains What His Father Misunderstood About Him

Season 4 Episode 408
Aired on 10/29/2016 | CC tv-14
Singer/songwriter Kevin McCall has long struggled to express his anger constructively. Violence has been a part of his life from the time he was a boy, and Kevin was constantly getting into physical fights during his youth. Now, however, the 30-year-old father of two is ready to change his ways and has joined Iyanla's House of Healing to become the man he knows he can be.

Iyanla's work with Kevin begins with a one-on-one session in which she digs into Kevin's childhood. When Iyanla asks Kevin what he learned from his father about "being a man," he cites the clear instruction he received all those years ago.

"You can't be soft; you can't be a wimp," Kevin says.

Rather than discouraging fights, Kevin's father seemed to value whether or not his son "won" the altercations. Iyanla questions whether Kevin's father saw him for who he was or whether he saw him for who his father wanted him to be, prompting Kevin to break down.

"I feel like he never understood me," Kevin says, wiping away tears. "I wasn't soft. I wasn't a wimp. I was just a good person."

This is the pain that Kevin must work through to be able to heal.

"I know he's a good man, and I know you love him," Iyanla tells Kevin. "But your healing hinges on allowing that little 7-year-old boy to forgive his daddy."

Another personal story:
Iyanla opens up about the suffering of her father and brother

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