A Pastor's Greatest Fear About Being Gay

Season 3 Episode 315
Aired on 09/12/2015 | CC tv-14
Derek is a 30-year-old man living a double life. No one knows his secret: He's a pastor and he's gay.

"I have been living a deceptive life. I am attracted to the same sex," Derek says. "I was taught that being gay was unnatural, that God doesn't like gay people. So I trained myself to be who people wanted me to be."

Derek has done everything in his power to keep his secret—even from his own family, who have shown open hatred toward gay men, he says. Fear of their judgment, along with what his congregation will think, has left him consumed with shame.

In the above video, Iyanla sits down with Derek for the first time and asks him to confront his double life. Watch as he explains what it means to him to be gay—and what scares him the most about his hidden identity.

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