The Best Way to Cure a Drift In Your Relationship
Take responsibility. People often labor under the mistaken idea that others "make" them feel a certain way. No one can "make" you feel anything. Your neighbor can't make you angry, your husband can???t make you cry, and your kids can't make you crazy. You have total control over your mood???and you also have total control over your actions. Thus, when in the midst of an argument, or at the end of a bad day at the office, ask yourself: What role did I play in creating this event? How have my actions led to this? By realizing that your life???s destiny is actually under your control, you can shift out of a bad mood and be empowered by your own strength.
Make a physical shift. Stop the world for twenty seconds. Close your eyes and breathe in and out deeply. Picture yourself mentally bagging up your bad mood in a trash bag, tying the bag tightly, and then tossing it out of your mind. Stretching and yoga can also get the blood moving and stop the mental wheels from spinning.
Act it out. Did you wake up feeling like a beast for no particular reason? Do you want to wring your husband's neck for forgetting the shirts at the cleaners again? The smallest things can sometimes make us want to snap???so go ahead! Sometimes the best way to cure a bad mood is to act it out to the extreme. Get into your "persona" (Are you a Grumpy Griper? A Put-Upon People-Pleaser?) and have fun with it. Punch a pillow, yell, cry, etc. and don???t hold back! Once you get the "persona" out of your system, your mood will most likely begin to improve immediately.
By noticing your drifts, and playing with your shifts, you can create an authentic life and positive, fulfilling relationships. So the next time you are in a bad mood, don't just wait for it to pass??? Shift!