I've been a bridesmaid 11 times in the past four years. Each wedding has cost around a thousand dollars. I love my friends and I can't say no, so what's the best way for me to save up? -Sara from the Ask Oprah's All Stars studio audience

DR. PHIL: Well, first off, this isn't about sayin' no to your friends. It's about saying yes to yourself. Okay? Because, come on... and let's be honest here. You say you're doin' this because they're great friends and they're altruistic. But isn't the truth that you really like the big show? You like the hair, you like the makeup. You like the dress, you like the show, so you're getting a payoff for this as well, right?

And this other question is, can you afford the ticket to the dance. And you're telling us, no you can't. I mean, across 30 years it'll be $55,000. So how do you say no? You just look at 'em and say, "Listen, I really, I really love you, you're a great friend. I would be tickled to death to be at your wedding, but frankly, I don't have a thousand dollars that it costs to do the dress. But I'll be there. Let me do something else. Let me serve punch, let me do whatever, but I don't have a thousand dollars, and so I'm just gonna have to say to say no, because I can't afford to be a bridesmaid for the thirtieth time in my life."

Next: Is there a way that we can actually come to an agreement on the actual wedding? Am I really being a groomzilla?