All Stars

Ask Oprah's All Stars - 20 Questions for 20 Somethings

All Stars
Oprah's experts on relationships, personal finances and health are back for another action-packed season of All Star advice!

On this episode, 20 questions on everything you need to know from the voice of your 20 year-old!

Click on each of the links below for answers to your most burning questions. Then, make sure to tune in Sundays at 9/8c for all new episodes!

1. Dr. Oz, how long does it take to sober up before I can drive?

2. Dr. Phil, how do I prevent myself from being slipped a date-rape drug?

3. Dr. Oz, are there any dangerous germs in communal bathrooms?

4. Dr. Phil, how do I teach my daughter to value money?

5. Suze, Do I need a financial backup plan?

6. Suze, how do I hold onto the money that I'm earning?

7. Dr. Phil, How do I learn to say, "No"?

8. Dr. Oz, is there a gay gene?

10. Dr. Oz, is there a safe way to tan?

11. Suze, are "cash for gold" stores legitimate?

12. Dr. Phil, what is the best way to break-up with my boyfriend?

13. Dr. Oz, what is the safest way to have multiple sex partners?

14. All Stars, I'm going to college in the fall. Can you each give me one quick tip on how to survive Freshman year based on your experience?

Dr. Oz, are there any dangerous germs in communal bathrooms?
Dr. Oz:The bathroom is not the most dangerous place when you're in college believe it or not. It's well ventilated; it gets cleaned a lot...It might be the grossest place, but I think the grossest thing to touch, is a keyboard, or your phone, cause its got those nooks and crannies that never get cleaned, same with a hospital. By the way, forget about the toilets in the hospital, someone cleans those. No one cleans the television remote touch it, touch your under arms, touch it, it all collects there.

A couple of things, don't make sense, E. coli, etc. they get kindly passed along. If you flush that toilet in that communal bathroom, all that E. coli, that fecal material gets into a plume and aerosolizes in the room. If you cannot lick the floor you're walking on, you better be wearing one of these because that's where you really get hurt in the bathroom and the last little myth, if I can debunk this for all the 20 somethings out there, you cannot get a sexually transmitted disease from a toilet seat, unless your having sex on it alright. Other than that those seats are clean...and viruses are dead within a couple of hours.
Dr. Phil, how do I teach my daughter to value money?
Dr. Phil:If she thinks she's gonna leave your house and start her life at the standard of living you have provided for her she is in for a huge disappointment.

Listen, I think pursuing your dream is hugely important but you have to afford to pursue it. I mean, you have to be able to afford that, and right now if your mother's willing to provide that for you that's great, but you do have to be able to understand that at some point you have to self sustain or you're not gonna feel good about who you are...guys, you gotta have a strategy. The difference between a dream and a goal is a timeline and an action plan.
Suze, Does my son need a financial backup plan?
Suze Orman: Mama, Dr. Phil and I are never going to be able to convince you cause you don't want to hear what we're saying. What attracts somebody to somebody is when they're powerful. What makes somebody powerful is when they have the money to pay their bills. When they know how much what they've got on costs. When they know they're the ones that are responsible for their future because they can take care of themselves.
Suze, how do I hold onto the money that I'm earning?
Suze Orman: So here would be the law that I would live by: Live below your means but within your needs. Just cause you can afford a 5,000 square foot home, if you don't need a five thousand square foot home, buy a three thousand. If you have a good car that you already like but you can afford, a great car, keep the car that you have. Live below your means not within your means, but below your means. Just cause you can afford it doesn't mean you should buy it. Buy what you need not what you want.
Dr. Phil, How do I learn to say "No"?
Dr. Phil: You've got to give yourself permission to say "no". I'm gonna tell you why. There's a difference between aggressiveness and assertiveness. Aggressiveness is when you say something to somebody and it hurts their feelings. Like, you could have said to him "No, you're too old and creepy and so I don't want to give you my phone number." Now that would protect your right for privacy and it would have hurt his feelings.

But you don't have to do that. You can say, "No, I don't really want to give you my number because I don't know you and I don't think it would be appropriate." You didn't say anything to hurt him. You just protected you're right. That's assertive. The other is aggressive. There's a difference. You need to give yourself permission to be assertive to protect your rights without hurting somebody's else's feelings, and that means you've got to make a decision that you value yourself enough that you would protect yourself the same way you would protect a friend. Value yourself as much as you value a friend. Be you own best friend. It's real easy after you do it for a little while.
Dr. Oz, are you ever too young to use Botox?
Dr. Oz: You can't make much of a difference with your wrinkles when you're 20, 25 or even 30 years of age because your skin is so flexible that it's gonna be able to bend back no matter how much you frowned or growled or anything else in life, so I think you're wasting your money to get Botox, and fillers.

Most of those things before the age of 30, most plastic surgeons, dermatologists won't want to do it...Some people get the beginnings of wrinkles but you're not gonna really impact them cause your skin is still flexible. When you get past the age of 30 depending on how you treated it, it becomes more like cardboard so it starts to leave creases in it.

I have a problem if someone is 20 years old and they're wanting to do things to them self to change. It is premature to do that. I'm not sure if it ever makes sense to do some of those things. But I certainly wouldn't think someone in their 20's should be doing that just because they're trying to capture the look of the day. Cause it's gonna change.

The issue is at what point is it worth even thinking about it, but before the age of 30 or 40 that should not be on your radar screen. There are bigger things, bigger places for you to grow and worrying about something that's going on just inside of your eyes or underneath your nose.
Suze, are "cash for gold" stores legitimate?
Suze Orman: Well, if he needs the money now is the perfect time to be selling. Gold's very high in terms of what it's costing all of you to buy it in terms of what you could possibly get to sell it. But please be aware of this: I saw this thing, this "Cash 4 Gold". I would personally stay away from them. If you checked the Better Business Bureau you would see hundreds and hundreds of complaints against them. Please understand that when you have jewelry, the only jewelry that's pure gold is twenty four karat gold. Make sure you price it around before you sell it. But now isn't such a bad time if you need the money.
Dr. Phil, what is the best way to break-up with my boyfriend?
Dr. Phil: Okay, you don't need to go through all the dramatics and the emotion but when you talk to them you need to say, "Look, this is not working for me, and it would be unfair to you if I continued along this road, because I know now this isn't going anywhere. It might be convenient for me to stay with you for another month or two or three or six. That would not be fair to you so I'm telling you straight up that I'm gonna respectfully exit this relationship. I wish you well. I wish you the best but I'm gonna ask you to respect my privacy."
Dr. Oz, what is the safest way to have multiple sex partners?
Dr. Oz: The biggest risk you have is not pregnancy. As a physician what I'm really concerned about is sexually transmitted diseases cause they keep giving and giving your whole life. Human Papiloma Virus causes cervical cancer. A lot of women I've taken care of lose their uterus', lose their cervix. It's a big painful process to be monitored all the time, but I'm very concerned about you being exposed and then you spreading the problem. So, the only way to deal with that is not a birth control pill. It's not a diaphragm or an IUD. The only way to deal with that is a condom.

There are now female condoms that are now more cumbersome to put in. But they work. And there are male condoms. But you gotta control your destiny. This is all about mental resilience. You being tough enough in the moment, which is hard to do because you're gonna be all passionate and everything else. For you to be able to say at that moment "No. This is my priority in life. I'm gonna pay the penalty for the rest of my existence if I don't deal with it now."

All the throat cancer these days women are getting, that's also from oral sex. So this is not just related to... I'm giving women an excuse finally to say "no". "No, I heard it on the show!"
All Stars, I'm going to college in the fall. Can you each give me one quick tip on how to survive Freshman year based on your experience?
Dr. Phil: Get ahead and stay ahead. I've always done that where I would get my books before the semester ever started and I would read them and then I would put 'em away and I could coast all semester long. Cause at the end of the Summer you're bored so go ahead and read everything. Get the reading list, get it done, cruise the rest of the time.

Suze Orman: The best way to get ahead and stay ahead is can you simply stay out of credit card debt. Debt is bondage. You will be powerless if you have credit card debt. Stay out of credit card debt.

Daphne Oz: Hey I'm Daphne, Dr. Oz's daughter and recent college grad myself, and I'm here to tell you the number one most important thing in my book is to have fun. Go out, Live your life, meet those friends. Enjoy that late night pizza. But do it in moderation and you'll be just fine.

Dr. Oz: That message might work with you guys. Go out and do what you want to do in life but always remember you can do half of the bad stuff and still enjoy yourself.


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