After that show, Iyanla says other marital problems came into focus. "I'm speaking about my experience, not about him at all," she says. "But my experience was that he became very depressed." 

Iyanla opens up about her marriage Watch  

Oprah says she understands how a comment like that could cause relationship trouble. "It's very hard," Oprah says. "The reason my relationship has lasted all these years is because Stedman had his own path and was happy with his path, proud of his path, and wanted me to be everything I could be."

Iyanla and Yemi divorced in 2007, and for years, this relationship expert says she felt like a fraud because she wasn't able to save her marriage. "All things are lessons that God would have us learn," Iyanla says. "When we got married, we had a no-out clause. ... But he changed his mind."

Looking back, Iyanla says she needed to experience this pain to eventually find peace. "He was just a character in God's divine play," she says. "[For] 40 years, I loved this man. I love him today. I love him. I don't choose to be married to him, but I love him. I needed to play it out that way. He was just the leading man."


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