Early on in the relationship, Barbara says she thought things would improve. "He would apologize at first and say he was sorry. He'd send roses; he always blamed it on the stress of his job," she says. "But after a while he stopped apologizing. It was always my fault. The reason that it happened was because what I did—I made the weather bad today or I caused the traffic that was there or maybe a sports team lost that he wanted to win. It was always my fault." Barbara says Raymond's violence could be caused by anything, and there was no way to foresee when it would bubble up.