Oprah: When did you make your plea on television?

Mariane: The day we received the second e-mail, I went on BBC and CNN and said something like "If somebody is going to give her life, it's me—so why don't you have the guts to come and get me? If you really want to have someone, take me instead." The investigators weren't too happy about me saying that! It was hard to determine whether to take that second e-mail seriously. Why would they kill him? What has he done? Then for three weeks we just didn't know what had happened. We kept trying to look for him. Asra and I were working around the clock. We were getting deeper and deeper into the Al Qaeda hub, and seeing more and more names, and it was more and more scary.

Oprah: How do you keep yourself from sinking into despair?

Mariane: I am a Buddhist, so I chant a lot. I thought, "No matter what, you're not going to get me."

Oprah: How did word come to you that he was gone?

Mariane: One day I felt like I was going to collapse, because I hadn't slept. And Asra and I thought it was weird that Bussey had left the house. We thought something was happening. We called the FBI, and nobody would answer the phone. Five minutes later, they all came and were devastated. Everybody was crying and they told me, "He's dead." I wouldn't believe it. They said, "There's a video." At first I was like, "Bullshit." So one of my very dear friends sat down with me and explained what was on the video. And it just broke me to accept that he was dead. My friend wanted me to just cry.

Oprah: And to accept the reality.

Mariane: Yes. That's it. It's over.

Oprah: Did he tell you in detail what was on the video?

Mariane: Not everything, but he did tell me Danny was beheaded.

Oprah: So did you break?

Mariane: Yes. I cried.

Oprah: Thank God! But then could you even accept what your friend was telling you?

Mariane: Yes.

Oprah: Have you ever seen the video?

Mariane: No.


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