Suze Orman's Webcast Transcript
Micki: We have about $3,500 in our savings, and then the kids have their own college savings accounts.
Suze: All right. But that's for the kids' college, so you can't live off that. That's in their name.
Suze: If you and/or your husband, I'm assuming you both work. Is that correct?
Suze: If you and/or your husband lose your jobs, just one of you loses your jobs, and I can't tell you how many e-mails I'm getting right now where I have couples writing me saying, "Suze, I came home and on the same day I was going to tell my husband that I lost my job, he told me—"
Oprah: He lost his job.
Suze: —that he lost his. Couples are losing their jobs together. If just one of you lost your job, how long would you be able to live in the house, feed the kids, do everything the way that you're living right now?
Micki: Maybe a month.
Suze: A month.
Suze: So how—so let's just—
Oprah: Ireland denied.
Suze: Yeah, just let's image this.
Oprah: Ireland denied.
Suze: Here's what I don't understand.
Oprah: It's—okay. Go ahead.
Suze: I'm sure you feel guilty that you can't go because that means you're not a good relative. That you're not—
Oprah: A good sister.
Suze: A good sister. That you're not going to spend $8,000 to go to your brother's wedding. What I don't understand is why didn't your brother say to you, "I understand this is going to be a lot of money. Therefore, either we'll have a wedding there and a wedding at home, so you can see it, but I don't want to put you into that kind of credit card debt, so either I'll buy the tickets for you or it's okay." I would deny you. I do not think you should do this. But you want to know what I do think you should do? And I think you should take it from what we're doing right here right now. Ready for this? Because this is what I've had so many people do. Somebody obviously is going to have a computer over there and they're going to be able to Skype you. And so take the computer that has a little eye in it or a camera and hook it up and be there live with them as it's happening with you in your home with the whole family watching it. Take it down and put the little computer on every single table so that you can say, "Hi, here's so and so. Here's so and so and here's so and so," and you can talk to them so you can be there, they can be with you, and guess what? It won't cost you one penny.
Oprah: I love it. And dress up and have a reception. Have some punch in the house and be a part of it.
Suze: I'm serious.
Oprah: I'm serious too.
Suze: I know you are.
Oprah: I think that's a great idea.
Suze: That's what you should do.
Oprah: I think that's what you should do. Especially, look, you're sitting right in our living room right now. We're in your room. And, yeah, I like that idea. But certainly not the idea of going in debt. It's like, you know, I don't—it's like people who go in debt for the wedding. And then they're spending the rest of their, you know, young years together, their early years together, trying to get themselves out of debt. It's certainly not worth the debt.
Suze: I just have to ask a very strange question. Is he going into debt to get married? To pay for this wedding? How is he going to—
Micki: I don't know. Their family is very quiet about financial and anything else that's personal, so I don't—I think we're the only ones who maybe are strapped for cash in the family and—
Suze: I doubt that. I doubt that highly. I bet you they're all strapped for cash. But anyway, regardless of what they do, remember honor yourself here. Honor yourself and I just wouldn't do it. Now I just have to ask this as well. Do you feel relieved now that you have permission to say that Suze Orman said I can't afford it?
Micki: Relieved and scared.
Suze: What are you scared of?
Oprah: What are you afraid of?
Micki: Well, I don't want to be the black sheep of the family and, you know, make them think that their wedding's not important enough to us that money comes first and—so how do I approach that with them?
Suze: I'll tell you how. Money doesn't come first. Your children come first. Your children come first. You come first. Your husband comes first. And if God forbid anything were to happen and one of you loses your job, you have $3,500 to your name. To your name. You shouldn't feel bad about that at all, my friend. At all. And I just—
Oprah: This is the kind of—this is the trance that we're all in, Micki, and—you know, we're not picking on you. I know it sounds that way right now. Because the truth—the truth sets you free. Just tell the truth. You can't afford to go. And that does not in any way diminish your love for your brother. And telling the truth should not in any way make her the black sheep.
Suze: The black sheep of the—
Suze: And again I'm just going to say this. Why doesn't your brother take into consideration your—what you're going through. And why is it always a woman or somebody feeling bad because they're not honoring what somebody else has decided to do even though that isn't respectful of your situation.
Suze: I don't buy it. I don't buy it. So you shouldn't feel bad at all, my friend.
Oprah: She's where you were when you had the rich friend.
Suze: Yeah, I know. I'm river than my friend now.
Oprah: Now you're richer than your friend.
Suze: But it's true and it's like, you know, I wanted everybody—
Oprah: And you wanted to impress the rich friend and you don't want anybody to think you don't have any money, and of course we don't want to be the ones in the family who aren't the ones—I understand it. I understand it.
Suze: But if you go in and tell them you only have $3,500 and you're scared to death, he'll probably say to you, "Oh my God. You have more money than I do." Don't be surprised. That's usually how it works.
Oprah: Thank you so much, Micki. Thank you.
Micki: Thank you.
Oprah: In 2009, Suze is asking everybody, before you spend money, ask yourself, "Is it a need or a want?" Now Marjorie is Skyping in from Littleton, Colorado, with a question about that. Marge?
Marjorie: Yes, hi, Suze. Hi, Oprah.
Marjorie: Suze, thank you so much for your book and making it available to everyone.
Suze: Did you download it?
Marjorie: I did.
Suze: Did you read it?
Marjorie: And I read it.
Suze: Wonderful. Good.