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The Reason You Chose Your Partner: The Imago Theory
 "[Understanding this theory] changed my relationship. It's unbelievable. It's almost like an electric current. Everybody draws to themselves the partner that most can reflect and help you to heal the wounds of your past." — Oprah
Harville Hendrix's groundbreaking tools and techniques are called Imago Relationship Therapy. It can help you understand the hidden reason you picked your partner and show you how to heal your relationship and yourself. The Theory Behind Imago
Your 'Imago,' which is a Latin term for 'image,' is essentially a composite picture of the people who most influenced you at an early age.
Dr. Hendrix believes that you unconsciously choose a partner, an 'Imago match,' who has positive and negative traits similar to your parents. This partner has the potential to help you heal unresolved pain from childhood. What is Imago Relationship Therapy?
Imago Relationship Therapy is a form of couples counseling that suggests that your marriage is therapy—you become healed not by a counselor but by the relationship itself.
Unresolved childhood pain such as abandonment, rejection, smothering, shame and helplessness often resurface in your marriage, and is the core of what is causing the pain and conflict in your relationship. The partner you chose, your 'Imago match,' is often the best person to help you heal because he or she is similar to your childhood caretakers in emotionally significant ways.
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