| |
| |
 |
||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
 |
 |
|
|
|
||||||||||||||||||||||||
|
|
|||||||||||||||||||||||||||
|  |
How To Get a Grip on Your Teen's Lip
Steps to End the War Zone in Your House Parents, do your kids use profanity and constantly talk back to you? Teens, do you feel that your parents don't understand your needs? Is your house a war zone? Dr. Charles Foster and teacher/author Michelle Trujillo offer these tips to start taking control.
Form a United Front Parents: If you are raising your teens with a partner, both of you must have the same priorities and rules for raising your kids. If you don't, they will get mixed messages and try to "divide and conquer." The Magic Question "What do you need to give me what I need?" Parents: In other words, if you want your teen to follow a rule you have set in your household, first ask your teen what he or she needs in order to follow that particular rule. Remember, teens are fighting to develop a sense of self. Get to know who they are, what they need and what they like. Learn to Listen Michelle Trujillo, author of Why Can't We Talk? says that teens fear talking to their parents because they won't be heard or understood. Parents: No matter how old you are, people just want to be heard. To communicate effectively with them, they need to know that their opinions matter to you. If your discussions turn into screaming matches, take a moment and say to your child, "This is what I'm hearing you say..." You are there to guide your children in making the right choices and help them become mature adults. Teens: If you feel that your parents aren't listening, write them a letter. You will be able to express not just words, but feelings. This also allows your parents some "think time" - time to digest your feelings. Negotiate a Contract Parents: Set rules that are reasonable, can be followed and enforced — and believe that your teen wants to keep the agreement and earn your trust. Teens: If you want to be taken seriously, be sensible, respectful and accept that you will not get everything you want. Both: Fewer, smarter rules on both sides beginning with the health and safety of the teen will lead to greater success. Remember, both sides should talk less and listen more! Set Consequences Parents: If rules are broken by your teen, you must follow through with consequences. Not all rules deserve the same severity. For instance, if you ground your teen for not making their bed and for breaking curfew, the grounding loses its impact. The Bottom Line Parents and Teens: You are a family and need to create an environment of mutual respect. Related Books
|
|
|
||||||||||||||||||||||||
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
||||||||||||||||||||
|
||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
