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 Author J.L. King says there's a secret sexual lifestyle called living on the "down low," an expression used to describe men who are married or have girlfriends but are secretly sleeping with men. J.L. knows first-hand about living this double life.
Is He Gay? "Why do I have to label myself to make you comfortable? …The act of the sex is homosexuality, but I don't want to get caught up in the whole gay culture, because the media and people look at gay people as being less than a man [in the black community]. The media has let white gay people feel more comfortable in their skin and it's accepted. The greatest taboo is to be black and homosexual, and I refuse to be labeled and classified that folks will look at me as something different. I am a man." His Marriage "My marriage wasn't a lie, because I love my wife, she was my best friend, we were running partners. What was a lie about the marriage was my desire to have sex with other men. I did not reveal that to her because I was scared." Gratification vs. Orientation "If I was a gay man, I may want to be in a relationship with another man and play house. But when you're on the "down low" all you want to do is have sex."
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