How much do you trust people? Are you the kind of person who doesn't trust anyone—even your spouse, your kids, your parents? Dr. Robin says the real problem isn't that you don't trust others—it's that you don't trust yourself. "People who trust themselves gravitate and attract other trustworthy people in their lives."
When Dr. Robin hears women say, "Men are not trustworthy" or "You should never give full trust to a man," she says what's really the issue is that these women don't trust their own instincts. If these women had trusted their initial feeling that the man wasn't trustworthy, they would have avoided getting into the relationship in the first place. "They don't trust their gut, they don't trust their own ability to use their wisdom to pay attention to their own desperation and where their desperation has driven them," Dr. Robin says of these women.
If you expect to be betrayed, if you expect to be let down, if you expect that someone will fall short, Dr. Robin says that you'll most often prove yourself right. "You're going to speak that into existence," she says. "You're going to draw that into your life. You're going to create the outcome of your destiny."
"Trust is not about someone else, it's not about whether or not other people are honest, whether or not other people are real," Dr. Robin says. "The place that you must begin is within, cultivating trust in your own self; that you can trust yourself to be wise."
Printed from Oprah.com on Wednesday, December 11, 2013