Do you often feel like you have a "kick me" sign on your heart? Would you describe your love life more as an "angst life" or an "I-wanna-strangle-him life"? If so, you can't let negative love from your past tarnish your attitude toward love for your future.

In my book, Prince Harming Syndrome, I help women break their bad love patterns for good using principles from modern-day research combined with the ancient philosophies of Aristotle. In particular, I mention how Aristotle was famous for believing that the best way to start any project is to begin with your "final purpose" in mind, or what Aristotle called your "teleology."

"Shall we not, like archers who have a mark to aim at, be more likely to hit upon what is right?" Aristotle asked.

Here is my "teleology" for you: I want to give you techniques to empower you to break bad relationship patterns for good so you can finally snag a happily ever after love future.

How do you envision your "love teleology" of a happily ever after love future? What does healthful, happy love look like, sound like, feel like, smell like, taste like, quack like? I want you to write down your ideal love story and email it to yourself for the next 30 days, morning, noon and night. (Note: If you're single, be sure never to write about a specific person you know. Always leave room to meet someone better!)

I did this love teleology visualization every morning at the start of 2009. It worked. Before year's end, I'd found my happily ever after and am now engaged to be married.

Admittedly, I did not find my guy right from the get-go. And that's exactly why doing this daily love teleology visualization helped me so much. Every time I'd find myself drifting toward cynical thoughts about love, I'd reread my love teleology email. It helped me keep my eye on the prize of what I wanted. I stayed optimistic and focused to find what I could so clearly envision.

I'm a big believer that mornings are your trajectory for your day. You want to make sure your day begins aimed consciously toward what you want in your life so you increase your likelihood of being over the moon about your life.

How to create your love teleology

The opinions expressed by Oprah.com contributors are strictly their own.

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