Here are a few things to consider and practice as you deepen your awareness of and capacity for being who you truly are in this New Year:
- Tell the truth to yourself. Think about how much of your self-worth is based on what you do, how you look, who you know, what you've accomplished (i.e., the external stuff). The more you let go of being defined by the external, the more freedom, peace and power you can experience. And, as you really get honest with yourself, you may realize that outside of these external things, you don't really know who you are. As scary as this may seem on the surface, it's actually great news and can give you access to a deeper and more meaningful experience of who you are.
- Appreciate who you really are. What do you appreciate about yourself that has nothing to do with anything external? In other words, what personal qualities (of being, not doing) do you value about yourself? The more you're able to tap into what you appreciate about who you are (not what we do), the more capacity you have for real confidence, peace and self-love.
- Practice just being you. As silly as it may sound, you have a great deal of experience being phony or being how you think you're supposed to be. It actually takes conscious practice to be able to just show up and be who you are. Practice alone, with people you know, and with total strangers. This is all about awareness: paying attention to how you feel, what you're thinking, what you say and how you show up. It's not about getting it right or doing anything specific; it's about letting go of our erroneous notions of how you think you're supposed to be and just allowing yourself to be who you are in the moment.
Have fun with this, talk to others about it and have a lot of compassion with yourself as you practice—this is big stuff for most of us. This year, instead of trying to be a new you, just be yourself.Mike Robbins is a best-selling author, sought-after motivational keynote speaker and personal growth expert who works with people and groups of all kinds. Robbins is the author of the best-selling books
Focus on the Good Stuff and
Be Yourself: Everyone Else Is Already Taken. He and his work have been featured on
ABC News, in
Ladies Home Journal,
Self and many others.
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