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Vanessa says that the desire women have to be liked, no matter what, is unhealthy. "Women, and especially young girls, want to please so badly—we want everyone to be our friends," Vanessa says. "Sometimes we do things that don't feel good in [our] gut. Listen to your gut! If it doesn't feel good, don't do it. Walk away. Once you grow older, you realize that all the things that you stressed about usually are your biggest assets."
"Looking back at my younger self, I would say, 'Be very slow in terms of dealing with boys,'" Vanessa says. "With a new body, with all the added attention, there are a lot of things that can happen very quickly that can change your life. It's always right to say no. If it doesn't feel good, you don't have to do it. You really can't make choices as a woman yet, even though your body may look like [a woman]. So just be mindful and take your time and be strong."