The good news: It's always your choice as to how you interpret and respond to life's disappointing, heartbreaking ebbs. You can choose to be miserable, or you can choose to motivate yourself to stretch your mind—seeking out the best interpretations and most valuable lessons.

If you're presently trying to get over a painful breakup with a Prince Harming, I recommend you do some liberating mind stretching. Begin by answering the following questions for yourself:

• Thanks to my Prince Harming Teacher, I learned in my next relationship I need to find a man who offers:
  
  
• Thanks to my Prince Harming Teacher, I learned in my next relationship I need to—on a daily and nightly basis—feel more:
  
  
• Thanks to my Prince Harming Teacher, I learned in my next relationship I need to—on a daily and nightly basis—feel less:
  
  
• Thanks to my Prince Harming Teacher, I learned in my next relationship I will insist my man bring with him into the relationship the following deal-makers:
  
  
• Thanks to my Prince Harming Teacher, I learned to keep my eyes open for the following red flashing warning light deal-breakers blaring in my face:
  
  
• Thanks to my Prince Harming Teacher, I learned I need to start to especially value finding a man with the following values:
  
  

After a challenging breakup, I suggest that every time you find yourself tempted to think negative thoughts, you return to the lessons that you've thankfully learned. If you find yourself with a pesky, self-flagellating thought spree rampaging through your mind, you can stop these thoughts by asking yourself the following question: "Are these thoughts I am now thinking leading me forward to finding more happiness—or backward to feeling more anger, shame and hopelessness?


What to say to yourself to move forward