PM: So what you really want is a sense of accomplishment? What would it take for you to feel that?

J: Well, it'd have to be difficult—I mean, nothing that you want in life is really easy.

PM: So you'd have to face some challenges?

J: Right.

PM: And if you had faced those challenges and had accomplished a few goals, how would you feel then?

J: I couldn't just stop there. I'd think, There's got to be something beyond this. There's always more.

PM: So what you really want is to feel as if you're on the move in your life. What will you have to do to feel that?

J: I'd have to stop denying that I'm stuck.

PM: How are you going to feel when there's no more denial in your life?

J: Fulfilled. And proud of myself.

PM: And how will you feel when you can honestly say, "I am really proud of myself because I've got a step-by-step plan—no more denial"?

J: On top of the world.

PM: And what exactly does that mean?

J: Free.

PM: So what you really want is to be free—free of a sense of being bogged down, free of a sense of living in denial.

J: Yes.

PM: Jackie, you've said, "I want to be proud. I want to be fulfilled. I want to be free." And you know yourself better than anybody else does. What will you have to do so that you can feel that way?

J: I'll have to be disciplined. And I must be open to the challenge of change.

PM: Very good. If you started living your life in a disciplined way, instead of in a "if it feels good, do it" sort of way, and if you opened yourself up to challenge instead of running from it, how would you feel?

J: I'd feel like I have a place in the world—and I won't always be wishing that I were somebody else.

PM: So what you really want is to accept yourself for who you are and feel like you belong somewhere in this world?

J: Yes.

PM: What a great goal that is!

What really makes people happy