Realize that happiness isn't a reward, but rather part of the journey. When people talk about happiness, they're often talking about an "it," prize or reward that's going to happen to them, but that's not how bliss works, Dr. Holden says.

People work hard to be happy without thinking about what happiness really is. "Some people will work an entire career, in order to be happy one day, without realizing that they could have been happy along the journey," he says. "A lot of people relate to happiness as if it's a pension that you're going to pick up later in life."