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Rabbi Harold Kushner's view on why bad things might happen to good people also comforted me. His overall view is God could have controlled everything about your life, the good and the bad. But then you'd merely be "stepford humans" and there'd be no fun in living at all. And no growth either, for that matter! What else are you here for but to live and learn? Which is why God granted you this fabulous perk called free will, and you have a choice in how you cope with any suffering you are dealt in the process of all your free-will living!

In reading about God, I also discovered how early deity-believers would literally rejoice during their times of suffering because they gratefully recognized how suffering forced them to look upward. To become fully conscious, think about their lives more deeply and appreciate what they had all the more.

Instead of seeking to find the meaning behind the concept of suffering, you should try to make sure your suffering becomes meaningful. Instead of asking God to remove your problems so that your life might be happy, you must purposefully try to learn as much as you can and become happier because of your new insights.

One universal good thing to come from bad things is the gift of empathy. Suffering imparts on all of us an informed sense of empathic understanding which helps us to better connect with one another. Without bad experiences, no one could ever fully relate to each other. And all of us greatly desire to connect.


What helps you get through tough times? Do you believe in a higher power or does something else bring you peace? Tell us!

Karen Salmansohn is a best-selling author known for creating self-help for people who wouldn't be caught dead reading self-help. Get more information on finding a loving happier-ever-after relationship in her book Prince Harming Syndrome.

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