Once Ryan realized his brother's death was a problem that didn't have an answer, he says plugging back into his own life was the only way he knew to move on. "I was working with my uncle's lobster bait business in Maine," Ryan says. "This was the opportunity to say my mind had broken free of all this stuff that I was intertwined in."
While he was working for his uncle, Ryan says he experienced a moment that changed his outlook "[I realized] if I can be happy here in dead fish, then I can be happy doing anything," he says. "I'm going to move forward and try to put that picture back up on the wall. And it's not the same picture. I'm going to make a new picture."