Candice and Nate are planning their wedding. They are getting married in a large church but their reception is at a smaller location, forcing them to cut their guest list. They feel closer to some of their friends than they do to their relatives. Can they invite some people to the wedding but not to the reception without offending anybody?
E. Jean Carroll, Elle magazine columnist: If you're going to have a big church wedding, invite everybody to the reception. Just don't spend a lot of money on the reception. If it's a matter of five or ten guests at the reception, it's just not worth [excluding anyone].
Harriette Cole, syndicated columnist: You can have two receptions. At the church you can have a reception with cake and punch and your receiving line. Every single guest is there and everyone is happy. You can have a smaller reception later on with less people. If family members are in question, you have to invite them. Marriage is a union of families.
Ceri Marsh, etiquette columnist: You may not be close [to certain family members] now, but think about how you'll feel five years from now. Invite them all.
Published on July 14, 2004