What's Your Conflict Style Quiz - Dealing with Conflict
Whether you love a good argument or scurry at the first hint of a raised voice, how you handle discord can affect your happiness and health. Take this quiz to identify your fighting style.
Exercise created by Debbie Mandel
O, The Oprah Magazine | From the August 2012 issue of O, The Oprah Magazine 
Illustration: Jen Troyer
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You thrive on accomplishment, so you tend to see conflict as a winner-takes-all competition, even if it means resorting to jabs or low blows when tensions spike. Rules of Engagement: When emotions run high, avoid fueling the fight with generalizations ("You're never there for me") or long-buried slights ("You barely talked to me at last year's party"). Recasting the point you want to make as a "feeling" statement ("I felt undervalued when you forgot my birthday") will help your opponent not get defensive. But if you sense that you're getting too heated, suggest tabling the conversation until you've had a chance to cool down. This exercise was created by Debbie Mandel, author of Addicted to Stress: A Woman's 7-Step Program to Reclaim Joy and Spontaneity in Life (Jossey-Bass). Next: How to solve workplace disagreements |
