Affair etiquette

A friend in an unhappy marriage confesses to an affair. Your ex-husband cheated on you. You can't condone the affair, yet you want her to be happy. What's the right response?

"People shouldn't be misled by their friends into believing that an affair is justifiable. You should tell her that it is the wrong solution, ethically and practically, to a bad marriage."
— Jack Marshall, president of ProEthics

"Affairs always hurt somebody. Can you muster the moral courage to speak to her—without scolding—about why you feel this way? The power of a single comment can be enormous."
— Rushworth M. Kidder, founder of the Institute for Global Ethics

"Don't let your experience with infidelity get in the way of a clear-eyed perspective. Encourage your friend to seek counseling—and to practice safe sex."
— Anita L. Allen, professor of law and philosophy at the University of Pennsylvania Law School