What to Ask Before Marriage
- Are you working in your chosen profession?
- How many hours a week do you work?
- What is your dream job?
- What is your retirement plan? What do you plan to do when you stop working?
- What does your job entail? (For example: Do you often travel for business, work at home or perform dangerous tasks?)
- What is your annual income?
- Should individuals within a marriage have separate bank accounts in addition to joint accounts?
- Do you have significant debts?
- Do you believe in establishing a family budget?
- How important is it for you to make a lot of money?
What sexual activities do you enjoy most? Are there specific sexual acts that make you uncomfortable? Be specific!
- Do you feel comfortable initiating sex? If yes, why? If no, why?
- What do you need in order to be in the mood for sex?
- How often do you need or expect sex?
- Is sexual fidelity an absolute necessity in a good marriage?
- Do you want children? When? How many? Are you unable to have children?
- Do you believe that children should be raised with some religious or spiritual foundation?
- How important is it to you that your children are raised near your extended family?
- Do you believe in spanking a child? What type of discipline do you believe in (time outs, standing in the corner, taking away privileges, etc.)?
- Should boys be treated the same as girls? Should they have the same rules for conduct? Should you have the same expectations for their sexual behavior?
They thought they had rejected the religious affiliations of their parents, but when they became parents themselves, they found themselves automatically being drawn back. Naturally, this created a serious conflict about which religious influence would dominate their child's life. Because these were not dogmatic people, they eventually found a way to give their child the gift of a mixed religious heritage, but not every couple will find that possible. So when you're having a conversation about religion, open it up beyond affiliation, and find out what religion means to each of you.
- Do you believe in God? What does that mean to you?
- Do you have a current religious affiliation? Is it a big part of your life?
- Does your religion impose any behavioral restrictions (dietary, social, familial, sexual) that would affect your partner?
- How important is it to you for your partner to share your religious beliefs?
- How important is it to you for your children to be raised in your religion?