Gavin de Becker

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Doris, who says she endured years of sexual abuse at the hands of her husband, appeared on The Oprah Show after leaving her husband. Unfortunately, her battle didn't end there—two months after she left him, Doris's ex-husband abducted her at gunpoint and raped her.

After the show, Oprah spoke with Doris again to ask if her she had sensed any warning signs the night she was abducted. "As I was coming home from work, it was just a very eerie, strange feeling as I drove up," Doris says. "It was darker than normal in my driveway, and there was a trash can sitting where I normally park right in the middle.

"I thought, 'Hmm, this is strange.' Because my mother lives with me, and she'll turn on the lights when it gets dark. It did give me a little eerie feeling—the hairs on the back of your neck kind of stand up. But still, I didn't listen to my instincts."

Gavin says that "eerie feeling" is exactly what he wants women to pay attention to. "We're trying to analyze the warning signs," he says. "And what I really want to teach today and forever is the feeling is the warning sign. All the other stuff is our explanation for the feeling. Why it was this, why it was that. The feeling itself is the warning sign."
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FROM: How the Gift of Fear Can Save Your Life
Published on January 29, 2008

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