Mai and Brian
Ages 60 and 63, married 36 years
Teacher's assistant and investment adviser
Trouble in Paradise
Mai: "There was a time when Brian was depressed, and he'd come home and pour himself a vodka every night. We had a big fight about that."
Brian: "It was just a few years ago. We were as close to cracking as we'd ever been. We had a real nasty snap, and I thought I didn't love her."
A More Perfect Union
Brian: "I reached the end of the line and I said, 'I do love you, and I'm not going to drink anymore.' Sometimes you stay together because you don't leave. That sounds like such a simple thing, but it's the bottom line."
Mai: "You may wonder, What happened to the man I married? He had so much good in him once. So instead of packing up and leaving, you try to find that part again. I deal with hard times by looking back at the man I first fell in love with. That's how I check myself—because I respect Brian the way I did the day I married him. Even if he doesn't seem to be the same man at the moment, I know those things I fell in love with—his courage, his honesty—are still inside him."
Brian: "Marriage is like a warm gas stove. Even if the burners aren't on all the time, you've always got to keep the pilot light lit. You have to go back to that, back to the beginning."