Before you talk to your partner, understand your body and learn about your sexual responses. Explore your body and communicate about what you've discovered. "Do the work yourself first—figure everything out, where everything is and how everything works," Dr. Berman says. "It really is about knowledge, education and communication."
Dr. Berman shares questions to ask yourself to help you better understand your body and its reactions:
- Where is everything on me? What is my sexual anatomy? Can I find it?
- Does it look like every thing's in the right place?
- How does it feel when I touch it manually or with a vibrator?
- How do I like to be touched? What feels good to me? Not only physically, but what's the context I need to get into a sexual frame of mind?
- What's the context I need in my relationship? What kind of intimacy, connection or romance do I need as a preamble?