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Marcus and Tamica's relationship problems stemmed from a lack of trust, Dr. Berman says. "The real issue for them was that Tamica was not willing to take that leap of faith," she says.

Marcus says he had some trust issues of his own. He says Tamica was the one who ended every relationship she had before him. "It kind of said something to me, but I ignored it," he says. "As we've been going through this, that's been coming up inside of me—like she's preparing her bag so she can get out," Marcus says.

Then, Tamica tells Dr. Berman her biggest fear is Marcus giving up on her and leaving.

To help Marcus and Tamica regain trust in each other, Dr. Berman prescribes some high-flying homework—a trapeze exercise. "It's about cooperation and trust. You're going to be doing an activity that also allows for Marcus to be in that knightly role of holding and protecting," Dr. Berman says.

Watch Marcus and Tamica work on their trust issues in the trapeze exercise.  Watch

Initially, Tamica is hesitant. "I've got you. I'm not going to let you go," Marcus says. Finally, she makes the leap.

"It felt good, and after that I was confident. He's the one carrying me through every other exercise now," Tamica says. "I think at that moment I understood the objective of love. I understand that it wasn't what I wanted. It was doing what was best for my husband and thinking about his well-being as well as me. And I let go."
FROM: Sex Therapy 2: Fears, Fantasies, Faking It
Published on November 21, 2008


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