Don't Continue to Repeat Yourself
If you've asked your child to do something and she doesn't, repeat yourself up to one time, and that's it, Rabbi Shmuley says. If you constantly repeat yourself, you become a nag, he says. "The last thing you want to do is become a nag, because they tune you out and avoid you," he says.
If your child still doesn't listen, point out the consequences. For example, tell them "I told you to clean your room once. If you don't do it this time, anything left on the floor is being given to charity," Rabbi Shmuley says. "The third time, don't repeat yourself," he says. "Follow through with the consequence and make sure you do what you said you would, otherwise you have no cache in the house."
Establish Age-Appropriate Punishments
If your children don't listen, make sure you give them age-appropriate consequences for their actions. For younger children, Rabbi Shmuley suggests putting them in a corner for a time-out, sending them to their rooms or denying something that they like. If it's something related to an object, like a toy that you asked them not to play with, Rabbi Shmuley says you have to take that toy away.
If your children do what is asked, give them a reward, Rabbi Shmuley says. "Sometimes I let my kids have a treat like ice cream or take them somewhere fun with me when they did a really great job at something," Rabbi Shmuley says. "It also makes them happy to do things for you because they know you appreciate it."
More advice on communicating openly with your child
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