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6. Size does matter. You must look for a partner with a really big heart. Have you seen evidence that your Prince Crush is intrinsically warm, open and kind, or the opposite? Have you witnessed your Prince Crush doing small acts of kindness like leaving a very big tip or helping someone with their shopping bags?
7. Has your Prince Crush talked with you about lessons he's learned about pain and disappointment? Does he show signs of empathy for your pain and disappointment? Does he express nurturing and supporting behaviors?
8. What's one of the sexiest qualities to look for in a partner? The ability to listen and compromise! Why? Because listening plus compromising keeps you feeling appreciated and connected, even over small things, like which movie to see or what place to eat. Have you experienced your Prince Crush being able to listen and compromise? Have you heard him utter the four sexiest words ever: "I'm sorry. You're right!"
9. Do you know the dirtiest of details about your partner's mental health history? Is he bipolar or on medication? Has he ever had a meltdown? Does he have anger management issues? Drug or alcohol addictions? Ask your man directly to explain why and how he broke up with his last relationship. Listen for long-term anger and Drama King stories.
10. If you want to live happily ever after, your man has to be happy. If he's unhappy all the time, he will view you through non-rosy life glasses! You need a man who embraces character values that help him be emotionally stable, even-tempered, addiction-free and full of high self-esteem. It's corny but true—it's hard for someone to love you happily if he's not happy with himself first. Do you sense your Prince Crush feels proud of who he is in his life? Does he allow people to walk all over him? Does he treat himself with self-nurturing and self-respect?
Karen Salmansohn is a best-selling author known for creating self-help for people who wouldn't be caught dead reading self-help. Get more information on finding a loving, happier-ever-after relationship in her book Prince Harming Syndrome.