Today, many people are becoming more cynical about marriage, and moving in together has become an acceptable and appealing alternative, Rabbi Shmuley says. But if you do want to get married, Rabbi Shmuley says statistics show that living together first is not the best idea.
Moving in is often a way of testing the relationship. "As with any test, you're constantly scrutinizing," Rabbi Shmuley says. "You become too cerebral, not sufficiently emotional, and you drift apart." If you want to live together for financial reasons, be sure to take a step back and assess your long-term goals. Others want to live together to test their sexual compatibility. "It's a myth invented by lazy lovers who don't know how to get their partners in the mood," he says.
"Many people believe in test-driving a relationship before marriage by moving in together. But if it's a test-drive your partner wants, send them to the local car dealership. You're a prize that can only be had when the customer is ready to commit."
Printed from Oprah.com on Thursday, December 5, 2013