Q: I have two teens. My son is 18, and my daughter is 16. As if that's not hard enough, I also have two stepsons that are soon-to-be 11 in May, and eight in April. The teens are more and more independent every day, and I'm having a hard time with it because they will be going to college soon. I'm having the empty nest feeling, I think. Having the two young boys is just not the same as one would maybe think. I think the real fact is this: They are not my biological children, so it is a different feeling. I love them too, but it is just different. Not sure what else could be said about it, but I hope that I'm not the only one that feels like this.
Daphne: I love my stepchildren, but in the same way I love my biological children? Oh no. I don't think it's biology though. If I had adopted a kid, I would love it as my own because I was his mommy. But my stepchildren have a mom and have another home, so at best stepmoms are part-time parents. No way it could feel the same. And if there are any tensions with the ex, the kids can be a Trojan horse for those feelings, so think of that too.