Many women find "bad boys" irresistible and end up wasting time in unhealthy, unfulfilled relationships, Rabbi Shmuley says. He talks about why some women are addicted to bad boys and shares his cure for this misguided romantic addiction.
According to Rabbi Shmuley, women are attracted to bad boys because they are exciting, dynamic and need to be "rescued," which makes the women they date feel special and necessary. For women who seek artificial drama while avoiding commitment in a relationship, the bad boy delivers, he says.
To help women get over their bad-boy addictions, Rabbi Shmuley offers this simple solution: Don't date bad boys! Realize that so-called bad boys are childish narcissists who are always focused on their own selfish needs and will never change their ways. Instead, start dating good guys with whom you can make a lasting, meaningful connection. "Goodness can have a certain charisma, and it's incumbent upon us to find it in men and stop dating the bad boys," he says.
"For some people, relationships are so predictably routine that their only escape from its monotony and predictability comes from the drama of dating a bad, bad boy. Throw the bum out. Get back your self-esteem. Learn to find excitement in deep, emotional connectedness rather than constant relationship strife."
Published on August 26, 2008