Looking back I'm surprised how this old me (who I suppose is really the young me) would bend so radically to please a guy, even giving up bending myself into my favorite yogi poses.
Happily, the new me (who I suppose is the old me) knows better. The new old me can clearly see how there's a huge difference between "bad compromise" and "good compromise" in a relationship.
What makes for this difference?
- A "bad compromise" is changing your habits and self in such a way that you wind up becoming less of your full, authentic, thriving self.
- A "good compromise" is changing your habits and self in such a way that you grow more into your most full, authentic, best self
Real-deal love happiness, according to Aristotle, comes from being involved in "a relationship of shared virtue," where you pick a mate who gets you at your core and lovingly inspires, challenges and supports you to become your best possible soul self.
"A relationship of shared virtue," therefore, is when you and your partner both welcome putting up with the temporary pain of personal change for the greater gain of personal growth—or what Aristotle calls "the education of the soul."
According to Aristotle, this personal growth or "education of the soul" is definitely worth developing because every time you put forth the effort to stretch and strengthen your soul, you increase your overall happiness. Basically, he believed that true happiness comes from surrounding yourself with people, habits and experiences which help you grow into your best possible self.
With all this in mind, putting in the work of "good compromise" is a positive way to ensure you're stretching and strengthening your soul so you can grow into your best possible self and increase your overall happiness.